So it's finally February.

The year is going by fast. Just about three more months of school left. Now that I think about it, last year was a pretty crazy time for me. I had been in a on and off relationship with Jesse, and things weren't going to tell. Then we broke up and it was kind of chaotic. Then I met back up with Isaac, and the feelings were still there after three long years. I missed him. We dated till around December, and things got kind of rough. We managed to stay close to each other, and we still are. We're not going out, but he's been wanting me to stick around. We're pretty close, and I honestly don't want anyone else besides him. In my heart, he's my everything. But he can't see that. Part of me doesn't want him to know, because I don't want him to disapproved of this overwhelming feeling I have for him. I thought I didn't, but last night I realized, I love this boy. I truly do. I don't know what he wants from me anymore. I don't know what I have to do to be with him. I just don't know. But if that happens to be something he doesn't want, I'll get over it. I'd rather it be meant to be, then just me wanting and wishing it to be. That sounds weird. Ha. But you know what I mean. So now I'm here. I don't know what's up with us. While we were sitting on this bench, he leaned over for a kiss..and then he smiled so sweetly and said I love you. That made me smile, and does everytime I think about it. Then he held my hand the ride home from Corpus. Oh and to top off the night. We had a beautiful, deep conversation. He told me things that meant so much to him. I will cherish those secrets forever. I don't know what to do. Should I wait for him like I really do want to, or should I move on to another hopeful like he wants me to?? He wants me to move on. He thinks it's that fucking easy. Well it's not. I've been talking to other guys, but they don't give me the special feeling that I get from him. It's like I can't look at another kind in that way. I can't see us together. It's weird. Everything that is going on is weird. I'm pretty sure a lot of people will think that once they read this. I even think it's weird. I think it's crazy sometimes. But there is so much more to the story. If you knew, then you'd understand.

Last week was alright. We had early release on Wednesday and we also got our progress reports. I barely passed Spanish with a 70! I'm pretty sure that grade went lower because I failed a recent test that wasn't put in our progress reports. This means I have to study hard and long for our test on Tuesday. Thursday I went to watch Big Mama's House part 2 with my friend John. It was fun. I tried forced feeding him Butterfingers. Ha. We couldn't stop cracking up when 'Big Mama' was in a bathing suit. It was truly disturbing. Lmao. We got Friday off on account of that Livestock Hooplah. I saw When a Stranger Calls with Isaac. That movie wasn't as great as I expected it to be. There were a few scary scenes. The lead actress sucked, her bushy eyebrows bothered me, it hardly scared me, and it sucked! Yesterday I was suppose to go to the movies with a few friends but I didn't make it back from Corpus on time. I went to Corpus with Isaac, his friend Daniel, and his girlfriend. We basically got there in about twenty-five minutes. That's what happens when everyone on the highway is going 90. There were like no cop what so ever on the highway. It was pretty crazy. We just went to the mall. I didn't buy anything except Chocolate covered almonds and gummy bears. What can I say, I'm menstrual. All that chocolate relieved my bitchyness. Ha, I had fun making fun of people with Isaac. There were a lot of strange people. I couldn't help myself. After all that, we went to Burger King. I had fun. Then we headed back home. I hung out with him till around 1. I enjoyed every moment of it.

Whooo..Superbowl Sunday! Too bad I don't like football. I'm only going to watch the commercials, and go buy 50 chicken mcnuggets at McDonalds! I'm such a fatty. I'm suppose to go hang out with Isaac today. Well it's getting late and I need to shower. I'll update whenever. Bye all!